Rhythm

Cold air.

Cold air. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Cold air. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

The air this morning has that ‘just blown off the snowy mountains’ feel to it.

And I haven’t even been outside yet.

Winter is here. It seemed to take a while arrive this year.

I couldn’t get myself out of bed this morning and yesterday I didn’t feel like exercising. It can be hard to get moving when it is this chilly.

I did, however, get going. I went for a run in the cold air yesterday and, of course, it was great.

A fresh blast to get the day moving.

Now I just have to get myself off the couch and out of the house.

No worries!

Love

Luke

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Day 1,289

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I am blah.

I am blah. Drawing Luke Hockley.

I am blah. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

I am blah.

It’s not a very nice way to be.

Nor is it a disaster.

It’s just a bit in between.

Blah is a nowhere land.

It's not any of the strong emotions that I have clear names for.

It’s like a version of life jetlag.

Something about the rhythm of life feels out of sync.

And I just find myself…blah.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,276

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Chosen family.

Chosen family. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Chosen family. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

I spoke to my beautiful friend Billie last night.

We’d been trying to connect for weeks, without success, and then finally the stars aligned.

It’s comforting to be back with someone who knows me so well. Who loves me so deeply.

Her little boy asked if “Luke was our family?” 

“Why, yes…he is”

We are a part of each other’s chosen family.

Which is an honour for me.

A real honour.

Love

Luke

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Day 1,267

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A walk along the creek.

A walk along the creek. Drawing Luke Hockley

A walk along the creek. Drawing Luke Hockley

Dear Self,

I went for a walk yesterday along Merri creek with a dear friend of mine.

We had some things to talk about, which we did.

There was a moment where we stood under a bridge and played with how the sound reverberated off the massive bluestone arch.

This incidental, childlike playfulness is the stuff of magic.

When these experiences are missing, when a friendship becomes purely about some project or outcome or a working relationship…or much worse when it becomes just about working out conflict or having difficult conversations, then the relationship lacks the reserves to keep itself going.

I find it can be so easy to let these things slip, or not make the time and space for them to happen. They seem like ‘nothing time’, finding time to be bored together so that something light and curious emerges.

In my experience these spaces are where friendship is built.

Which is the most important time of all.

Love

Luke

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Day 1,261

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I am.

I am. Drawing Luke Hockley.

I am. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

A slowly unfolding mystery.

The unravelling of a tangled ball of wool.

Delicate but robust.

Determined and fragile.

A question that changes at any given moment.

I am.

Love

Luke

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Day 1,173

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Delicate recovery.

Delicate recovery. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Delicate recovery. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

Delicate recovery.

Kindness.

Slowly creeping closer to awake.

Revived.

Tip toe.

Step by step.

Alive.

Listening.

Growing towards the light.

Gentle, gentle, gentle.

Love

Luke

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Day 1,156

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Why am I moving?

Why am I moving? Drawing Luke Hockley.

Why am I moving? Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

A few years ago, I used to be a full-time contemporary dancer.

Moving all day was something I loved. When I think of this time I feel a sense of completeness.

For a bunch of reasons, I stopped doing this full time.

One of the questions I had at the time was “Why am I dancing?”.

At the time dancing was my movement practice and it was my artform. I wouldn’t even have been able to separate these two things. I wouldn’t have known these two things were two parts of what I was doing. If you asked me, I would have just said I was a dancer.

Over the last decade or so I have unwoven these two things, accidently really.

I have looked to other forms to ask questions of the world as an artist and to keep myself moving.

I’ve discovered a lot about what I want to say as an artist…and that moving is one language to say that stuff with, but not the only and perhaps not my most powerful.

Also, I have just today realised, I am passionate about moving, full stop. Completely separately to the body’s ability to make art from moving. That moving is a human right. And that I once again want a life that involves a lot of moving.

“Why am I dancing?” has become “Why am I moving?”. The answer is pretty simply “Because I’m alive”.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,151

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Moving forwards.

Moving forwards. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Moving forwards. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

Gentle, gentle.

Slowly, slowly.

One little piece, then the next.

This little step, then this one, and then the next.

And then I’m moving forwards again.

It is simple really.

Love

Luke

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Day 1,147

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Moving comes first.

Moving comes first. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Moving comes first. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

To be well I have to move.

I’ve known this for years.

But I’ve just learnt this lesson on a deeper level.

What I have learnt is that even though, if you asked me, I would have said that movement is critical to my wellbeing…deep down I still felt that it was a luxury, an extravagance an indulgence.

The amount of moving I have been doing on the last few weeks of holidays have been patchy.

And suddenly ‘out of nowhere’ sitting and writing at a computer is starting to be become unbearable. I’ve been feeling all out of sorts. Unable to focus properly, feeling irksome, unhappy for no reason (because I am very happy with my life).

Yesterday I returned to base camp.

I dedicated a chunk of time to movement. And listening to what my system needs. And yes, this worked.

And it taught me something very important.

Moving is not an optional thing I add on top of my busy life. It is a foundation that enables everything else.

Moving comes first. Then the other things can flourish.

This year I will be bold about that.

It feels a little scary.

But I’ll reap the rewards.

Love

Luke

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Day 1,146

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I love the rhythm of my life.

I love the rhythm of my life. Drawing Luke Hockley.

I love the rhythm of my life. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

The thing about holidays is that the rhythm of my life goes all haywire.

It seems like it is ideal.

Freedom!

I can do what I want, sleep when I want, watch movies when I want, exercise when I want, eat when I want…

And that all sounds perfect, except it does not suit my constitution.

I am a creative soul who is incredibly nurtured by rhythms and structures.

I love deciding, in advance, what is important to me and then structuring my time to reflect that.

The decisions about what I will be doing when are then taken care of.

Time away from such a schedule is great, for a moment, but I tend to let go of the fundamental things that keep me balanced. Movement, writing this letter early each day, eating my meals at regular times, getting enough sleep…

Maybe I need to build a holiday rhythm? So that way I can have time away from the everyday but not lose the fundamentals?

Also, it’s nice to have a break every now and then, but the everyday is not a punishment I need to escape.

It is comforting to know that I love the rhythm of my life.

Love

Luke

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Day 1,143


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