Friendship

The upside.

The upside. Drawing Luke Hockley.

The upside. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

The upside of a very hectic few weeks is that being on the other side of all that busyness can feel amazing. 

Love

Luke.  

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Day 1,297

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Exercise is a miracle.

Exercise is a miracle. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Exercise is a miracle. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

Exercise is a miracle.

Exercise with a mate is pure magic.

I am in an intense week this week and pushed through a wall to get to the gym with my mate Nick.

I can not explain how good it was. How much it helped me feel like a human!

Exercise is a miracle!

Love

Luke

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Day 1,296

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The only way to find out is to ask.

The only way to find out is to ask. Drawing Luke Hockley.

The only way to find out is to ask. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

Sometimes I have imaginary conversations with people in my life.

It’s usually when things haven’t gone well, or I haven’t heard from someone in a long time and I seem to be trying to fill in the gap of what the other person might be thinking.

The problem with these thought experiments is that, even though I’m in charge of both sides of the conversation, I can find myself believing the other person has said or at least thinks the things I have imagined they are thinking or saying.

Of course, none of this is real. I am filling a gap here by making up both sides of the conversation.

The only way to find out what someone is thinking is to ask them.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,292

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Chosen family.

Chosen family. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Chosen family. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

I spoke to my beautiful friend Billie last night.

We’d been trying to connect for weeks, without success, and then finally the stars aligned.

It’s comforting to be back with someone who knows me so well. Who loves me so deeply.

Her little boy asked if “Luke was our family?” 

“Why, yes…he is”

We are a part of each other’s chosen family.

Which is an honour for me.

A real honour.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,267

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A walk along the creek.

A walk along the creek. Drawing Luke Hockley

A walk along the creek. Drawing Luke Hockley

Dear Self,

I went for a walk yesterday along Merri creek with a dear friend of mine.

We had some things to talk about, which we did.

There was a moment where we stood under a bridge and played with how the sound reverberated off the massive bluestone arch.

This incidental, childlike playfulness is the stuff of magic.

When these experiences are missing, when a friendship becomes purely about some project or outcome or a working relationship…or much worse when it becomes just about working out conflict or having difficult conversations, then the relationship lacks the reserves to keep itself going.

I find it can be so easy to let these things slip, or not make the time and space for them to happen. They seem like ‘nothing time’, finding time to be bored together so that something light and curious emerges.

In my experience these spaces are where friendship is built.

Which is the most important time of all.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,261

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Like family.

Like family. Drawing Luke Hockley

Like family. Drawing Luke Hockley

Dear Self,

I was raised in a loving, kind and generous family.

It was far from perfect, which was perfect for me.

I know that not everyone has such a positive experience of being in a family.

But I like to think that as adults we can create that for ourselves.

I’ve been running Campfire as a monthly event for around 3 years now. I like to think that one of the reasons people come along is because, for a night, it’s an opportunity to look after the people around you like they are family.

To give them space if they need space, to chat and bring them out of their shell if that’s what they need. To be with them as they are awkward and funny and playful and shy and sad and whatever they are. To help them know that it is ok to be themselves all the time…but especially here, now when we gather around the Campfire and share with each other.

All that we need is for you to be you so that I can be me.

When I say that Campfire is like a Family Concert…that’s what I mean.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,243

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A rare glimpse of success.

A rare glimpse of success. Drawing Luke Hockley.

A rare glimpse of success. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

I had dinner tonight with a good friend who has been watching all my adventures in art and life for quite a while and she said to me…

“You should feel really proud of what you’ve done, you’ve been working at all of this for a long time, and it’s working.”

It was nice to step back for a moment and look at this. It is so easy to get caught up in working on making things just that little bit better.

But this. This right now. This life I have. I am blessed. I feel alive. I feel connected and loved. I feel creative. I feel of use to the world. I have purpose.

It’s a rare glimpse of success.

It’s worth remembering it's the glimpse that’s rare not the success. I suspect I am this ‘successful’ all the time, I just forget to look up and see it.

Or maybe I don’t think I’m allowed to look up and see it. That if I look directly at it, it will evaporate.

It’s time to get over that and enjoy what’s happening here, now, as often as I can.

It’s a total joy to be enjoying my life, just as it is.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,241

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I know these things to be true.

I know these things to be true. Drawing Luke Hockley.

I know these things to be true. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

There are some things that I know to be true.

Just keep moving forwards, even if the step is tiny, take it.

When I’ve had very little don’t take any of my opinions seriously. Seriously. Get some sleep and then I’m allowed to reassess.

My friendships are deeper and stronger than I ever let myself believe. Hold onto that when the ocean gets rough. Because that’s a lifeline. Focusing on the undermining conversation I’m having with myself about it all is like wondering why the storm won’t rescue me.

This shall pass. Be kind and gentle as the rough bit moves through. It really will pass. Really. It will.

I know these things to be true. Writing them down and remembering them when it is a bit rough is very useful.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,238

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If it hurts.

If it hurts. Drawing Luke Hockley.

If it hurts. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

If it hurts it can be hard to say it out loud.

I avoid it.

Think of ways around it.

Try anything…but saying it.

But if it hurts then telling someone is a really, really good idea.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,233

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I want to, but…

I want to but… Drawing Luke Hockley.

I want to but… Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

I want to, but it is too close.

It is just there.

Just a simple reach, and I have bridged the space between us.

I want to, but the risk seems too great.

I want to, but I am ridiculous and wild and strange.

Hurt and uncertain.

Weird. Wounded.

And you will see that.

I want to, but I don’t know if I’m ok with seeing you seeing me like that.

I want you to ask how I am doing,

So, I can tell you.

Mostly – I’m ok, but today…

Today, I’m not really that ok…

That’s what I want.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,213

Show your support for Dear Self by becoming a monthly supporter of my work or by buying some stamp money. Your support means I can keep doing the things I do to make the world a better place.