Belonging

Mean and funny v’s good and generous.

Dear Self,

I have a reasonably quick wit.

When I was younger it would get me into a bit of trouble at times.

Because, for whatever reason, the ‘immediately funny’ view of a situation can often be the mean view of the situation.

So, I’ve learnt to forgo the laugh in order to remain true to my belief that seeing the good, the possible…the generous view of a situation is the kinder, more productive and more appropriate approach to just about everything.

Occasionally I fail at this. Mean and funny out competes good and generous.

Damn it.

I’m sorry about that. I really am.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,310

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The upside.

The upside. Drawing Luke Hockley.

The upside. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

The upside of a very hectic few weeks is that being on the other side of all that busyness can feel amazing. 

Love

Luke.  

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Day 1,297

Show your support for Dear Self by becoming a monthly supporter of my work or by buying some stamp money. Your support means I can keep doing the things I do to make the world a better place.

Exercise is a miracle.

Exercise is a miracle. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Exercise is a miracle. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

Exercise is a miracle.

Exercise with a mate is pure magic.

I am in an intense week this week and pushed through a wall to get to the gym with my mate Nick.

I can not explain how good it was. How much it helped me feel like a human!

Exercise is a miracle!

Love

Luke

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Day 1,296

Show your support for Dear Self by becoming a monthly supporter of my work or by buying some stamp money. Your support means I can keep doing the things I do to make the world a better place.

Chosen family.

Chosen family. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Chosen family. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

I spoke to my beautiful friend Billie last night.

We’d been trying to connect for weeks, without success, and then finally the stars aligned.

It’s comforting to be back with someone who knows me so well. Who loves me so deeply.

Her little boy asked if “Luke was our family?” 

“Why, yes…he is”

We are a part of each other’s chosen family.

Which is an honour for me.

A real honour.

Love

Luke

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Day 1,267

Show your support for Dear Self by becoming a monthly supporter of my work or by buying some stamp money. Your support means I can keep doing the things I do to make the world a better place.

A walk along the creek.

A walk along the creek. Drawing Luke Hockley

A walk along the creek. Drawing Luke Hockley

Dear Self,

I went for a walk yesterday along Merri creek with a dear friend of mine.

We had some things to talk about, which we did.

There was a moment where we stood under a bridge and played with how the sound reverberated off the massive bluestone arch.

This incidental, childlike playfulness is the stuff of magic.

When these experiences are missing, when a friendship becomes purely about some project or outcome or a working relationship…or much worse when it becomes just about working out conflict or having difficult conversations, then the relationship lacks the reserves to keep itself going.

I find it can be so easy to let these things slip, or not make the time and space for them to happen. They seem like ‘nothing time’, finding time to be bored together so that something light and curious emerges.

In my experience these spaces are where friendship is built.

Which is the most important time of all.

Love

Luke

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Day 1,261

Show your support for Dear Self by becoming a monthly supporter of my work or by buying some stamp money. Your support means I can keep doing the things I do to make the world a better place.

Like family.

Like family. Drawing Luke Hockley

Like family. Drawing Luke Hockley

Dear Self,

I was raised in a loving, kind and generous family.

It was far from perfect, which was perfect for me.

I know that not everyone has such a positive experience of being in a family.

But I like to think that as adults we can create that for ourselves.

I’ve been running Campfire as a monthly event for around 3 years now. I like to think that one of the reasons people come along is because, for a night, it’s an opportunity to look after the people around you like they are family.

To give them space if they need space, to chat and bring them out of their shell if that’s what they need. To be with them as they are awkward and funny and playful and shy and sad and whatever they are. To help them know that it is ok to be themselves all the time…but especially here, now when we gather around the Campfire and share with each other.

All that we need is for you to be you so that I can be me.

When I say that Campfire is like a Family Concert…that’s what I mean.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,243

Show your support for Dear Self by becoming a monthly supporter of my work or by buying some stamp money. Your support means I can keep doing the things I do to make the world a better place.

Anything I want.

Anything I want. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Anything I want. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

What if I could do anything I want for one day?

What would I do?

I’d sew and sing and spend time with people I love.

Ok.

Done.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,205

Show your support for Dear Self by becoming a monthly supporter of my work or by buying some stamp money. Your support means I can keep doing the things I do to make the world a better place.

More than useful.

More than useful. Drawing Luke Hockley.

More than useful. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

I like the idea of my friends wanting to spend time with me because they like my company rather than the idea that they enjoy my listening and problem-solving skills. My worry is that people find me very useful to be around and that I trade this ‘usefulness’ for their friendship.

Weird right?

I don’t know if this is really a thing or if it is a thing that I have made up.

I think that there is some kind of thing going on here. Which is about what I think I need to do to keep my friends and about how well I ask for the things I need from my friends.

I default to this ‘support’ role in many situations in my life. So, it’s pretty likely that that is what I am doing with my friends.

I’d like to spend time with my friends without being in that mode. Being in that mode is so comfortable, so familiar, I can’t even imagine what it would feel like to not be in that mode.

Am I talking about having fun together? Perhaps I want to ask my friends to get together with me more often just to have fun.

I think it is pretty well established by now that I am still in the process of working out how this whole friendship things works.

Sounds like I want to have time with my friends where I am being more than useful…time when I am being playful.

Sounds like it.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,200

Show your support for Dear Self by becoming a monthly supporter of my work or by buying some stamp money. Your support means I can keep doing the things I do to make the world a better place.

I could.

I could. Drawing Luke Hockley.  

I could. Drawing Luke Hockley.  

Dear Self,

I could be content.

I could accept myself.

I could find joy in who I am.

I could be kind.

I could refuse to pick up other people’s garbage.

I could be remarkable.

I could, I could, I could.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,183

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To the brim.

To the brim. Drawing Luke Hockley.

To the brim. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

I am full.

Full to the brim.

Grateful and relieved.

Enriched,

Tired and inspired.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Love

Luke

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Day 1,181

Fallen in love with Campfire? You can show your support by buying some Firewood. Also…

Show your support for Dear Self by becoming a monthly supporter of my work or by buying some stamp money. Your support means I can keep doing the things I do to make the world a better place.