It has been an extended period of not really wanting to write this letter every morning.
It’s a bit disconcerting, if I am to be honest.
I feel a little bit bored with having the same conversation with myself again.
I’ve been here before, and I feel like I know what the answer is…but can’t quite catch it and hold it in my hands.
At this point I ask myself whether I actually want to keep writing this letter, then I go through a process of identifying what the benefits are (or aren’t), then I decide, again, whether I keep writing or not (so far it has been to keep going, obviously).
I can feel that I am holding myself outside of this conversation with myself.
I think I know that the letters I am writing at the moment are not particularly rich or insightful or profound…but they are a lifeline.
I’m moving through something right now that I don't understand…and having this thread to hold the basket of my life together is pretty important.
Even if it is a bit boring and repetitive.
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