Sometimes I feel anxious.

 Sometimes I feel anxious. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Sometimes I feel anxious. Drawing Luke Hockley.

Dear Self,

Sometimes I feel anxious.

I feel funny even saying that, because I know that anxiety, for some people, can be crippling.

That’s not the way it is for me, which I am very grateful for. My level of anxiety falls into the manageable, ‘normal’ range (I guess!)…but it is still uncomfortable and often unpredictable and therefore unexpected.

I’ll just feel a bit overwhelmed and unearthed. Short of breath and a racing heart.

It is only very occasionally that I experience this, so I don’t really understand what is happening or how to avoid it…but I have worked out a few things.

It is always an accumulation of things, not one specific thing.

When I become anxious getting certain tasks finished (that are worrying me) can relieve it…however it’s not always clear exactly which tasks I should do in order to relieve the pressure. And, interestingly, those same tasks at another time (where I hadn’t accumulated so much pressure) would be a walk in the park, not anxiety producing at all.

Also, exercise and music and dancing and making with my hands all help…but not always. They are important as part of the balance…but if I am using them to avoid doing the tasks that are worrying me…then they are not always helpful.

Saying what is going on out loud to a friend is very helpful.

So is trusting myself to know how to chart the course back to balance.

Balance…yes, balance.

When things are in balance then my ‘to do’ list is just a ‘list of things to do’, not a weight around my chest.

That’s worth remembering.

Love

Luke.

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Day 884

Stamp Money.
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Buying some stamp money is a way to say thanks. A way to show your love and appreciation for the things I make and share.

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