I stopped having fun. Drawing Luke Hockley.
I stopped having fun with my drawings.
When I first started adding drawings to my letters more than a year ago I was having so much fun.
I was curious about how my scribbles on a page might be able to convey some meaning, add something additional to my daily letter.
But then I got all worried about creating a picture that people would think looked good on Instagram.
That's not fun.
I feel like I’m at a cross roads with this whole project. I don’t think it is time to stop…but I also don't want to keep going with it feeling like this.
I want to get some perspective on it all.
Not sure what that looks like.
Actually, I want to start having some fun with it again.
Which means I have to make it clear to myself that this is a choice, no one is making me do this every day. I’m choosing to do it…but why?
I’m choosing to do it because I can see that over time I make progress in getting to know myself and that I am generally happier. Even if, for days on end, it can feel like I’m getting nowhere.
Why am I sharing that journey? Why not just do it for myself?
I’m hoping that seeing someone else persevere, kindly, with a project like this might encourage people to do their own version of generous self-reflection.
Do I want to keep going?
Yes. Right now I’m learning how to have a sense of humour about the fact that what I am creating each day is not that interesting. Staying in there when it gets tough is a life lesson that has great value to me.
Looks like I’m in for another day.
Love
Luke
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Day 864